Tingly

My foots asleep. So it's all tingly.

Basically, I'm writing this for myself. It's just a long explaination of my day, and you really don't need to read it. It'll be boring. And pretty stupid. So feel free to stop reading at any time.

Today was an interesting day. It was Blackout Day for Spirit Week, so I dressed up. Of course. ;) I always dress up. But today was probably my favorite day. I wore my black lounge pants with grey leggings underneath, and a black t-shirt that says "My bishop rocks," and my black flip flops. I was comfy all day long. :D I love it. I was kind of late leaving the house because I couldn't figure out what I wanted to wear. I still managed to make it to school on time, though. So that's good. Today was an A day, which means first period spanish, second period adult roles, lunch, third period history, fourth period social dance.

First period was alright. We did what we always do: Nothing. He explained conjugating verbs. I'm sorry, but if someone in my class doesn't know how to conjugate a verb, they're screwed. Because, even though I'm in spanish 1, we learned that at the VERY beginning of the year. And here we are in 4th term, and he's explaining it again. My spanish class is full of idiots.

Second period wasn't too exciting, either. We did a cross word, which took a surprisingly long time, and she gave us 2 other worksheets that I didn't get to finish. One is on budgeting (ugh) and the other on marriage. They're due next time, so I'll have to finish them this weekend sometime.

Lunch was pretty good. Alan and I had cooler ranch doritos and blue ice gatorade. Lunch of champions. All of the really healthy olympians? Yeah, they totally have cooler ranch doritos and blue ice gatorade for lunch everyday. I so know it.

Third period was... well, we had a DBQ today, and I wanted to scratch out my eyes. I did a horrible job. We'll leave it at that.

Fourth was actually pretty good. We've been working out the kinks on our cha cha performance. I think it's going to be really fun. I don't know if it will look good, but it will be fun. And that's all that's important. Plus, when we weren't dancing, we played Skum. Now that's a fun card game! :D

After school was when everything kind of... collapsed. Today was the auditions for concert choir. Now, everyone is going to think I'm a baby, and it's kind of weird considering how outgoing I am most of the time, but I'm not a performer. I don't like auditions, I don't like performing by myself, I don't like that kind of thing. It scares me to death. I wasn't too scared for the auditions, because Katie was going to audition with me, and it was going to be ok. But then Katie told me she wasn't auditioning. She didn't want to be in the choir. I had been nervous all day, and Alan had sort of been teasing me about it. He's so confident in performing, I don't think he realised how much it scared me. Anyway, I was in the cafeiteria after school, like I always am, when Katie called me and told me that she wasn't auditioning. I told her it was alright, and then I booked it out of the room. I knew that i was this [] close to a meltdown, and I didn't want everyone to see me cry. I'm such a baby! ;) So I went to b hall, which is where I knew Alan would be. If I saw him, that would be great. But I didn't want to spend a lot of time looking for him because I didn't want anyone to see me cry. So then Jamie stopped me in the hall "Are you ok?" Then I lost it. I started crying, and I explained everything to her. She consoled me, and talked to me, and comforted me. I think Austin might have gone to get Alan, or something. Because not long after Austin walked away, Alan walked up behind me. "Courtney Courtney Courtney!" I turned to him and started crying harder. "Court, what's wrong? Come on, let's go on a walk." So we walked, and I explained it all to him. He told me it was ok. He was going to help me, he would go into the auditions with me and it would be alright. He told me to go home and get my permission slip, and then come back and find him. So that's what I did. I was still sobbing when I got home. Truthfully, I don't know how I drove myself home. I was crying the whole way. I know, I know. It's rediculous. And I feel pretty stupid about it all now. But it's been a hard month, and I've been stressed out for a lot of things lately. This was just the icing on the cake.

So I came home. I talked to my mom. I drank a lot of water, cuz crying really isn't good right before you sing. I washed my face, brushed my hair. You know, the basic girl feel-good things.
Then I ventured back to school. I was walking into the building when Kortney showed up. She knew that I had auditions soon, and she knew how scared I was. Unlike Alan, she understood from the very beginning. We walked to the band room together, and on the way I called Alan. Alan felt really bad, but he couldn't come because he was helping with the play, and they were right in the midddle of a run-through. He wasn't allowed to leave the theater. If Kortney hadn't been there, I would have freaked out all over again. But I told Alan that I would be ok. ("Are you sure?" "No.") And I told him that I'd call him when I was finished with everything. Kortney played the song for me, as I practiced over and over again. Finally it was my turn. Kortney came in with me, and was my moral support. T talked to me a bit about choir, and why I hadn't been in it before ("Cuz I've never really thought that I could sing very well.") then she had me sing the melody. After, she told me that I should have started choir years before. She told me that my voice is very nice, it just needs a little training. Then she had me sing some scales. Kortney said that T had put me with the sopranos, and that she was trying to figure out my range. Alan told me that T had meant what she said about my voice. Huh. Well that wasn't nearly as painful as I had thought it was going to be. But Kim says that now I HAVE to try out for the musical, because now I'm "over" my fear of auditioning. NOT TRUE!! I'm still gonna be afraid. And I only have 2 weeks to figure out which song to sing, and to learn it. Uh oh. Just what I need. More stress.

I know this is a stupid post, but it feels good to get it all out. So I'm gonna keep going.

Molly and I have all but 2 lines of our song for the seminary talent show learned in sign language. Now I just have to get Alan to mix the music for me. Maybe I'll see if he can mix it for me this weekend. If he has any time. I hope he will, because the talent show is on Thursday, and we need to practice with the music.

I have a bunch of stuff going on tomorrow. I have a vocab test with over 100 words, I have 2 math assignments that I need to turn in, and I need to pass off at least 2 songs so I'm not failing guitar at midterm. The most important is the vocab test. I can always turn in the math late, he doens't take points off. And my mom says it's ok if I fail guitar at midterm, because she knows I can bring up the grade easily. So I need to focus more on the vocab tonight.

I'm pretty tired. I have been for a long time. I think it's mostly because of school. I guess I'm not getting a good enough sleep at night, or something. Who knows.

Ok, this is getting to be a really long post, and I think I'm pretty much out of things to say. Except that my room is really messy. Anyway, yeah. That's it.
Have a great night.
*corky*

Montana Cowboy

I got a kick out of this. Hope you all like it.

A cowboy at a bar in Great Falls, Montana, orders three mugs of beer and
sits in the back room, drinking a sip out of each one in turn.
When he finishes them, he comes back to the bar and orders three more.
The bartender tells him, "You know, a mug goes flat after I draw it. It
would taste better if you bought one at a time."
The cowboy replies, "I know, but that's O.K . I have two brothers, one in
Billings , the other in Helena . I'm in Great Falls . When we left
home,
we promised that we'd drink this way to remember the days when we drank
together. I drink one for each of my brothers and one for myself."

The bartender says, "I think that is a nice custom."
The cowboy becomes a regular, and always orders three mugs and drinks
them in turn. One day he comes in and orders only two mugs.
All the regulars take notice and fall silent. When he comes back to the
bar for the second round, the bartender says, "We don't want to intrude
on your grief, but we want to offer our condolences on your loss."
The cowboy looks quite puzzled for a moment, then a light dawns and he
laughs. "Oh, no, everybody's fine," he explains. "It's just that my wife
and I joined the Mormon church and I had to quit drinking. Hasn't
affected my brothers, though."

Giggle giggle.

In other news, I learned how to laugh in sign language today. I would show you, but yeah.... ;)
Have a great day!
*corky*

The Fab Five

Alright, Jaron did this, and as we all know, I'm an idea thief. ;) lol. Anyway, I really would like to do a Fab Five. I'm going to talk about five great things that happened today. I'm going to try to do this quite often. Maybe once a week or something. I think it will help me to focus more on the positive, and maybe it will help you, too. Who knows. ;)

Ok, here's today's Fab Five!

Flippin' Five: It's Friday!!! What more could I ask for?! lol. Weekends rock. It would rock even more if I didn't have the ACT tomorrow, but hey, Prom should be great, right? ;)

Fantastic Four: No Terms test in English!!! We were supposed to have a test on terms for the AP test in English today. But guess who got us out of it? That's right, ladies and gentlemen. The Amazing Corky got our entire AP English class out of the terms test. Go me! ;) Not to sound cocky or anything. ;)

Terrific Three: I got a 94% on my math test today. :D I guessed on 4 of the problems, and managed to get 3 of them right! Talk about a blessing. :) I missed 2 problems. One that I had thought I would get right, and one that I had guessed on. That totally helped my day today. I was kind of worried about that test.

Tremendous Two: Seminary Ice Cream Social!! Oh man, I love ice cream! And I love seminary. So when the two combine, great things happen! Like an ice cream social. ;)Lots of friends, lots of fun, lots of ice cream. :D And the weather was nice, so we had it outside. What can be better than that? Oh man, I love strawberry ice cream. :D

And, drum roll please...

Overwhelming One: Molly and I decided to be in the seminary talent show. Oh my goodness, it's going to be AMAZING!! We decided to learn sign language to some songs that everyone will know. We're thinking Britney Spears, Natasha Beddingfield, *NSync, and more. :P Oh my heck, it's going to be good. :D So, everyone sluff their 1B class, and come and watch Molly and me in a seminary talent show that will totally rock your socks. ;)

And that is todays Fab Five. Thanks for reading. ;) lol. I'm a geekwad, it's true. :D

Have a wonderful weekend!
*corky*

School.

I hate it. The end.

*corky*

Rain!

Brierly Ashour, “Rain in April,” Friend, Apr 1979, inside back cover

I like the sound of April rain
When skies are gray and clouds hang low.
Rain warms the brown and frozen earth
And helps the sleeping flowers grow.


At night I hear the sound of rain
And think how thirsty plants must be,
All shut up tight inside the ground
Awaiting spring to set them free.

Sandra A. Metcalf-Moore, “Rain Is Fun,” Friend, Apr 1985, inside back cover

Rain is fun
As it splashes and sploshes.
I like to skitter in it
With my old galoshes.


I like it when raindrops
Pounce on my head
And trickle and dribble
And chill my nose red.


I like it when the wispy wind
Joins in the spree
And tousles my hair
As I frolic—whoopee!


Dora Faye Redman, “Rain Puddles,” Friend, Jun 1986, 27

Rain puddles hold
dark clouds,
a bit of blue,
a shimmer of sun,
green treetops,
flower faces—
And me!


Sandra Liatsos, “Spring Rain,” Friend, Apr 1981, 39

I like to stand
In silver rain
And catch the shining
Droplets flung
Like a flood
Of falling stars,
Cool and tingling
On my tongue.

Nothing more to say. I love rain. I'm crazy. And random. It's true.

Shh... listen.
*corky*

I <3 Spring Break!

It's already day 2 of spring break 2007, and I'm lovin' it! :D

Yesterday was awesome. I went to Meet the Robinsons in 3D with Kim, Alan, and Jo. Then we went to the mall and just messed around. We walked around wearing our 3D glasses. That was fun. :D We messed around with all the cool massage-y things in Brookstone, and wandered around Bath and Body works. We had lunch at Chick-fil-A, where Blythe was working. After we got sick of the mall, we went to Arctic Circle for ice cream. Next time, we're sticking to Wendys. The ice cream is good, but the service sucked. After eating ice cream (yummy) we went to this cool Japanese store and looked around. I love Japanese stuff. I didn't buy anything, but I totally could have bought half of the store, it's that cool. :D But I don't think it would all fit onto my shelf with all of my Japanese dolls and stuff.

Anyway, I finally ended up getting home, where I crashed for about an hour. I have no excuse. Other than I was really sleepy. :D Sleep deprivation is finally taking it's toll. ;) I woke up in time for dinner. After dinner, I went to a party at Katie's house. Oh my goodness. SO much fun. There was a guitar hero competition going on. Ping pong, dodge ball with tennis balls (until they all went over the fence), not to mention most of my friends, and some good music. I spent a lot of time with Trevor, because I haven't seen him in FOREVER. He takes classes on the internet now, so he doesn't go to Taylorsville anymore. I miss him!!! We had so much fun. Speedbump. :D

So I got home around 11. Talked to my parents for a few minutes, logged on for just enough time to check my email, and then headed to bed.

Now I'm up and showered and almost completely ready for the day. My mom is taking my sisters and me shopping for Easter outfits. I'm pretty excited to get a new skirt. And maybe new shoes. :D I'm such a girl. :D

Today at about 2:30 we're heading up to Logan. And I am sooo excited!! An aunt and uncle that I haven't seen in a LONG time are going to be there. I'm spending the night at James' house, which means we'll watch a movie, and then I'll watch him play video games until I fall asleep at around 2 (if I manage to stay up that long!). I'm pretty psyched. I'll be home tomorrow night sometime.

Oh man, I <3 spring break!
*corky*

Something To Think On.

I don't know if Jaron reads my blog anymore, and honestly I don't care if he is. If he is reading it... well, maybe that's a good thing. I still read his blog, and that might be a good thing, or it might be a bad thing. The thing is, no matter how angry he makes me, no matter how hurt I feel, no matter what happens, I still love the kid to death. And I miss him. When he's sad, I'm sad. When he's happy, well, I get mixed feelings. Sometimes I get angry. Because he's happy without me. Sometimes it makes me really happy, just because he's happy. But when I see him hurting... when I see him feeling like he's all alone... well, it makes me want to comfort him. It makes me want to be there for him, to let him cry on my shoulder, to help him through whatever he's going through. My dad... well, he said something last night that made me think. And it made me feel horrible. He told me that I have to decide between having a lot of friends, and having a best friend. He said that when you have a best friend, it might mean spending every waking minute together. It might mean feeling clingy, or getting over things that anger you. Being a best friend means putting everything aside and caring for that person before you care for yourself. And if that's what being a best friend means, I guess I wasn't a very good friend. There were times where I wanted to spend time with other people, and so I did. I thought I was doing the best I could, but I could have done better. And I truly am sorry for that. I know I was wrong. I know I did some things that might not be rude, or mean, but things that a best friend wouldn't do. I wish I had the chance to be the best best friend. I wish I could show Jaron how much I care for him. I wish I had one more chance to be that friend. I wish I could make him feel better...
yeah, that's how I feel.
*corky*

One Sleepy Corky

I was gonna wake up at 5 to finish some homework. Yeah, didn't happen. I was gonna wake up at 6 to get ready for school. Yeah, didn't happen. My mom came in at about 15 after to pull me out of bed. I don't wanna wake up... Sleepy Corky... I have 2 of my harder classes to go to today: english and pre calc. But I start off with seminary and end with guitar, so that should be ok. I don't know how I'm going to be able to stay awake all day... lol. It's a b day, so Alan, Kim, and I will probably be going to lunch. Wendy's probably.

Wow, I've gotten horribly predictable. Sad, isn't it? After school I'll go to Big Brother/Big Sister, come home at 3:15ish, get online for awhile. Have dinner, start homework, get online. Go to bed, wake up tomorrow and do almost the very same thing all over again. That's depressing. Maybe I need to do something spontaneous this week. But not today. I'm too tired...

Lol. I should be getting ready for school right now. But I'm not. As usual... lol. Maybe I'll sleep in math... I never understand anyway, so why should it make a difference? Cody sleeps in math... lol. Can you all tell I'm way out of it? Maybe I need some sugar. Or some caffeine. :D lol. Have you ever seen me on caffeine? Even just a sip sends me off the wall. It's fun! Hm...

Anyway, I better keep getting ready for my sad, predictable day.
I'll let you know if anything exciting happens.
Ha. Ha.
*corky*